You can't let your illness define you.
I've heard it so many times and I still have no idea what that really means. In theory I think I understand that point, but when I think about what the action would be that would affirm that I haven't I can't seem to get a clear picture. The messages are so contradictory.
Most people with chronic illness are forced to change their lifestyles or choose to in order to "cope".
When you find that sweet spot, or maintenance mode where you are pretty confident you have your flares under control because you've stopped exposing yourself to the triggers. Have you let it define you? Or is it just about the amount of things you accomplish, the topics you discuss, or the mental state you project?
The base of my personality is the same it's my routines that are different my perspectives that have changed. Is it who I am or who I project that matters?
It seems to me to be true that people believe you have let your illness define you if you talk about it's influences in your life, and that is only acceptable when followed by a but.
This seems like an opposing idea to acceptance.
Chronic illness does impact your life and defines your reactions and routines. The luxury of not planning is gone.
I suppose I get what the moral is here; don't let it make you bitter. What I think most people really mean is this; geeze we were just talking small-talk right? I didn't mean for you to tell me anything real/sad, and oh please stop complaining I don't want to hear about your problems. That is the real moral here: share your problems with others who understand and learn to misdirect the rest. I always forget the moral.
We should have a meeting that focuses solely on skills of misdirection and polite responses. Or learning how to not say anything at all!
I'm a crap liar. I always fail the charm test.
Don't get me wrong a positive attitude does make a difference but for me that difference isn't on me but those around me. Those people are usually worth the extra effort but sometimes the mask slides it's inevitable.
It would be nice if people stopped using that phrase, it's confusing and guilt inducing.
My name is Molly Schell and I am a Wife. (at the time I posted this anyway)
My name is Molly Schell and I am an Artist.
My name is Molly Schell and I am Compassionate.
My name is Molly Schell and I have Fibromyalgia.
My name is Molly Schell and I want to hear about what makes you YOU even if it's the hard things that define you.
I found this article that might help some of you define "living" and I think I mostly agree. But ultimately I will say this; no one can decide how you should live or how your living measures up, chronic illness will impact you and those around you, if they care they will help you redefine what living means an accept that new life just as you must.
http://m.huffpost.com/us/entry/5482294