I know it's a world filled with verbal land mines, things you should and shouldn't say and you can't always know what's right and what's not. I would say the basic rule is to try not to be insensitive. What that means to me is, listen. People will give you loads of clues when you are headed toward those mines, if you don't have any problem with gore; then by all means go right on ahead.
I know us Fibro's can tend to be a tad sensitive... pun definitely intended, but this is for those of you who maybe haven't figured this out yet. Our illness is misunderstood, we know that and we are more than happy to educate you, but you need to understand a few things;
No amount of positive thinking or will power is going to make us better. It is not all in our heads (psychologically speaking) and it is not just some physical manifestation of our psychological problems, true like anything our mental well-being can affect our outcomes, but that is not key. Think of it more like a system-wide failure, the brain is our keyboard and the keys have been rearranged, nothing makes sense and there is no cipher.
If you are truly interested in us and would like to avoid some of the mess, than this is some advice for you. A sentence should never start with:
You're too- Young, smart, pretty, tough, practical to be in so much pain.
At least- anything.
If you could just- whatever, you could/would...
Please don't tell me why I'm this way, unless of course you are qualified to do so.
I know you probably have all the best intentions, but you have some learning to do. We all do, it's part of becoming a better person. I love it when you try to relate (I don't mean compare I mean relate.) I love it when you listen, or hug me to show you care or when you accept what I'm saying is true for me. I'm not saying you can't have an opinion, just know that I know my body and I've been dealing with this for a decade, the only thing you can do to help me is be my friend. That requires compassion. Here's a little video on compassion/empathy by Brene Brown that I think is perfect:
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=1Evwgu369Jw
I'm not criticizing I'm critiquing, if you love me for me then make room for my Fibromyalgia, because it is unfortunately a large part of my life and I hope you can be too.
